So you had an idea that I kind of liked;
Can’t remember why now, but I really was psyched.
“Let’s get married ‘fore the end of the century!
And give up your sports; can’t risk an injury.”
“Two become one.”
Signed. Sealed. Done!
And while it was still ’99,
you showed yours and I showed mine.
“Two become one.” Could we have known what it means?
In-over-heads, newlyweds, barely out of our teens.
Love. Honor. Cherish. It would have been so awesome.
Had you only liked me and your mother-in-law some.
“Two become one.” Let’s get started!
Wedded bliss ruined? Just ’cause I farted?
I was such a good spouse, as everyone knew.
I’d have been completely selfless—had it not been for you!
So you had an idea that I (secretly) approved of;
let’s move on with our lives, find us some new loves.
Turned math upside down—that was so you!
Hired lawyers and judges, turned one into two.